“Fear is the condom of life...
...It doesn’t allow you to enjoy things!”
Before you already train your guns on me for my not merely
touching upon a taboo word from any Indian’s dictionary but also for my audacity
to ridicule its very purpose I wish to make clear that for all my penchant to
be ‘ORIGINAL’ while indulgently playing with my words I have found it quite
challenging to come up with a catchy phrase worthy to qualify as a fitting
title for the subject matter of this text. Last Sunday’s Academy Awards
serendipitously gave me the much needed impetus as an unsuspecting audience
heard Mexican director Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu’s now (in)famous back stage
assertion while attending to media queries after having won the best director &
the best film award for his absolutely engaging comedy drama of 2014 ‘Birdman’.
When asked, “Did the Oscar validate what he’s been doing and how his
ambitious ideas have resulted in these wins?” he cheekily (and possibly
without realizing that his every utterance would be cut to swords later)
answered “It’s a good question, because I haven’t figured out why I did what
I did. I think fear is the condom of life. It doesn’t allow you to enjoy
things. This was real. It was making love, for sure!”
I do not want to ruffle any restively flipping feathers or
attract the ire of NACO (National AIDS Control
Organisation) which could find this quite ‘Western’ sound bite too
uncouth to its mission of making India AIDS free by propagating the cause of
safe sex (among others) while encouraging all and sundry to use the most
effective deterrent (against AIDS), easily available in the form of an
innocuous condom! Contrary to what Inarritu’s hasty (and for its widespread
global dissemination, irresponsible as well) metaphor, uttered in a zest might
suggest, for all their incontestable life saving potential “Condoms reduce fear, not promote it as the
risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection causes anxiety, so condoms
can help you relax and enjoy your relationship more!”
While most of the
rational and socially conscientious individuals wouldn’t acknowledge any
creative brilliance in the impromptu popcorn burst in Inarritu’s head it would
be insane to take away from the fact that Birdmen did indeed win on its
cinematic virtues having won plaudits for its
long, complex, unbroken shots -- looking like one continuous take. I found a
real life parallel of its soothing effect while indulging in one of the most anticipated
activity I was looking forward to doing for a long time, Ballooning.
For
all its notoriety the only indisputable (and in all fairness I reckon the
actually intended) message from the titillating quote is that fear is undeniably
the most decisive impediment while one strives to enjoy the life to the
fullest, especially when one fancies seeking thrill from various forms of
adventure activities but develops a cold feet the moment fear factor assumes
precedence over other aspects of such indulgences like the cost involved, etc.
Consider the case of such a pleasant experience one could have while gently
gliding at a respectable height standing in the comfortable compartment of a
hot air balloon! One tends to invariably, selectively browse through the
statistically miniscule number of accidents involving this fun activity! Of
course, just a couple of days ago the world mourned the second anniversary of
the deadliest balloon accident in history when on 26 February 2013, a hot air
balloon carrying foreign tourists ignited and crashed near the ancient city of Luxor, Egypt, killing 19 of the
21 people on board! Considering the fact that thousands of balloons ascend
every day across various global locations (I was informed that around 1,200
registered balloons ply in the ballooning capital of the world i.e., Cappadocia
in Turkey alone) and annually millions of adventure junkies get their quota of
fun satiated by riding one of them the probability of a ‘’balloon’ accident is
no significantly higher than any other event including and not limited to the
omnipresent road accidents taking place everywhere! Not for nothing are
accidents called ‘mishaps’ also.
As Wikipedia would confirm the hot air balloon is the oldest successful human-carrying flight technology
with the first untethered manned hot air balloon flight being operated over 230
years ago! Modern day hot air balloons are able to fly to extremely high
altitudes. Almost a decade ago, Vijaypat Singhania made all the Indians
proud by setting the world altitude record
for highest hot air balloon flight, reaching 21,027 m (68,986 ft)!
Still earlier, almost a quarter century ago, the 'Virgin Pacific Flyer' balloon
completed the longest flight in a hot air balloon when Per Lindstrand and Richard Branson flew 7,672 km (4,767 miles) from Japan to
Northern Canada! With a volume of 74 thousand cubic meters (2.6 million cubic
feet), the balloon envelope was the largest ever built for a hot air craft.
Designed to fly in the trans-oceanic jet
streams, the Pacific Flyer recorded the fastest ground speed for a manned balloon
at 245 mph (394 km/h)! Phew! That’s far more than what Lewis Hamilton
in control of any formula one beauty could ever dream of and still
significantly higher than what the India’s proposed bullet train at 350 km/h
would be restricted to offer to its stunned Indian Railways patrons who have
never experienced even half of this speed!
Looking for some more of trivia? The longest duration (for a
balloon ride) record was set by Swiss psychiatrist Bertrand Piccard & Briton Brian Jones, flying in the Breitling
Orbiter 3. It was the first nonstop trip around the world by balloon. The
balloon left Château-d'Oex, Switzerland, on 1st March 1999 and
landed on 21st March in the Egyptian desert 300 miles (480 km)
south of Cairo. The two men exceeded distance, endurance, and time records, travelling
19 days, 21 hours, and 55 minutes! Steve
Fossett exceeded the record for
briefest time travelling around the world on 3rd July 2002. The new
record is 320 h 33 min. If that’s not good enough a motivator for one to shed
his or her inhibitions arising out of any insipid fear and look for a hot air
balloon around then what else could?
Ballooning is very weather dependent. All the professional
agencies organizing balloon safaris would unquestionably inform all those
booked with them if the weather is unsuitable. If so be the case, they won’t
simply allow any monetary considerations to control their decision making and
would ideally allow re-booking for another convenient day. Standing in a hot
air balloon doesn't feel the same as standing on the edge of a cliff or being
in an aircraft - you float gently along with the breeze so there's no sensation
of movement. As they rightly say, “The
balloon does not so much as leave the ground as the ground leaves the balloon!”
One doesn’t feel any acceleration or movement as one does in a lift or an
aircraft. We float gently along with the wind; ballooning is a calm experience,
even calmer than swimming with a Dolphin which I did in Pattaya and covered in
one of my write-ups in the third week of June 2013 (http://scorpiofury.blogspot.in/2013/06/those-28-seconds.html)!
If one were to evaluate the underlying ‘realistic’ fear
across different forms of rides then one can’t even compare ballooning with
some of the other activities like sky diving & bungee jumping. They are for
extreme thrill seekers and would certainly warrant one to have more than average
appetite for soaking in the sudden inrush of emotions while over powering the
inherent fear psychosis. If one were to start somewhere before enrolling in
one’s full course of thrill through his or her life there is no better activity
to do but ballooning. If you are not in a hurry to go to a far off place like
Cappadocia than look no further. It’s right close to Mumbai, in Kamshet which
is around a couple of hours of drive away. Just book your tickets with all of
your family members and friends with SkyWaltz (India’s first fully licensed
& Government approved commercial Hot Air Balloon operation) and sleep early
on the night preceding the day of your flight for you would have to hit the
ground running from Mumbai no later than 4:00 AM to be able to reach Kamshet in
time well before the sunrise. The tickets could be bought on BookMyShow as well
as on SkyWaltz’s own website http://www.skywaltz.com/booking-balloon-safari.php.
In a standard flight around 4 to 8 people could stand in two
compartments depending upon the type of balloon. There is no upper age limit
but you must be able to stand for around an hour. For all our fascination to
take our young guns along to ensure they don’t miss out on their quota of fun
there is no point in inconveniencing them if they are too young as the
intermittent overhead blast of hot air with a loud thud would scare them off or
if they are too short as they won’t be able to see over the sides of basket.
A balloon flies at different heights up to 4,000 feet (which
is what the regulatory restrictions put it to by the Air Traffic Controllers as
the commercial flights routinely fly just above this height near the ballooning
locations which are not so far off from the nearby city airports). In the flight
that we took the highly skilled pilot had several years of experience behind
him as he so skilfully skimmed the treetops and kept controlling the altitude
of the balloon for the best visual experience. He varied the altitude during
the flight, flying low (once he almost touched the river flowing just below the
balloon’s basket) to offer an exclusive sneak-peak into daily village life and
its hidden treasures and then climbed high to witness the amazing patchwork of
colours and contours. It was an absorbing experience to say the least which
also allowed us to capture the captivating moments from our cameras (just don’t
forget to take your selfie-sticks along for allowing you to click your happy
moments from several acute angles where you won’t otherwise be able to take your
smart phones to for your biological limitation).
The real fun lies in the fact that each flight is
spectacularly different from the other (and that’s precisely why I am all
geared up for my next flight, in Cappadocia in couple of months from now).
Depending upon the day’s weather condition, whilst one knows from where s/he
will take-off, nobody would genuinely know where you will be landing as the
balloon drifts where the wind decides to take it! Alas, on the day I flew in my
maiden flight with my family it was probably the calmest day of the year and
that effectively meant there were no surprises in store. I have kept my fingers
crossed to get to experience some real thrill in Cappadocia.
Apart from Kamshet I understand that in India other
ballooning locations are Jaipur, Pushkar, Neemrana, Jodhpur, Jaisalmer,
Ranthambhore and
Hampi. Since most of the Indians who are senior citizens don’t generally feel
excited about other adventure activities for all the doting sons and daughters
here is what you could do to make for a memorable gift for your parents. On any
special day in their calendar just book them & you on a nearby hot air
balloon safari and then get to see their happiness for the rest of their life!
Easy, isn’t it?
I started this piece from a borrowed quote from the Academy
Awards and that’s why it is fitting that I shamelessly borrow another before I warp
up. J. K. Simmons who won the best supporting actor award for his awe
inspiring (and scary) performance in Whiplash gave a shout-out to his wife and
“above average” children before advising viewers to call their mothers and
fathers. “Don’t text. Don’t email. Call
them on the phone. Tell them you love them, and thank them, and listen to them
for as long as they want to talk to you,” he said. Who are we to argue?
(C) Rits Original
Scorpiofury.blogspot.com